Is It Time to Make Lemonade?

I'm sure you have heard the phrase, "When life gives you lemons, make lemonade!" So I wonder, if you feel like it is time to make lemonade? I have personally experienced more than a few disappointments in life and remember that I was not initially thinking it was time for me to make some lemonade. As a person who likes to plan, and does best when I have the opportunity to do so, I am most thrown by those transitions that I don't have time or the opportunity to plan for.

Although you probably have heard that suggestion to make lemonade before, following that advice is not always easy. For me, it is typically less of an issue when the transition is something I have planned. But, in my unplanned transitions, there was something inside me still asking why. There was that whole issue about how I thought things would be - that weren't and, apparently wouldn't ever be! There was also the issue of recognizing and accepting the fact that that particular phase of my life was over. I read books and articles on transitions - a few for a second time. I recognized that before one can really move on, one must bring closure to what was. Usually, it also requires an uncomfortable middle period between the ending of one phase and the beginning of a new one. Although I knew those things, sort of from an intellectual standpoint, "knowing" them from an emotional aspect was more difficult to accomplish.

So, for me, I have to remind myself that getting through a transition will take time. I generally write more in my journal. Sometimes I would just ramble on writing whatever thoughts ran through my mind, sometimes I would write a letter - perhaps to the person I had lost. I have spent some time alone to think about how I would cope and shape my life, once I get through the transition. I have pulled out some of my old music to listen to - because some of the lyrics said words I could not put together to say. I would especially try to take care of myself during those temporary transitional periods.

So, if you are coping with (or just trying to endure) a difficult transition, I encourage you to spend some time taking care of you. Remind yourself of your good traits and good deeds. Do some other things to make you feel good about you or, for a while, do nothing. Allow yourself some time to mourn your loss, but not so much that you wallow in your sorrows. What is important is that you unburden yourself of the strain from your loss before you begin in a new direction. If needed, find someone to talk to - if not family or friends, perhaps a professional. Often a transition drains us physically, mentally, and socially.

In due time, you must find ways to refuel, recharge, and reconnect. Listen to and watch for signs of what is to come. Then use some time to think about what you would like in your life so you can develop plans to achieve it. I'm sure that in time you, too, will be ready for some nice cool, lemonade.


Mary Ann Davis, M.A., is a Licensed Professional Counselor (LPC) providing coaching and counseling for life's transitions; including preparing for a career change or job search, planning for retirement, coping with an empty nest, and planning to return to work or school. She meets with individuals in person and via telephone to assist in creating solutions to transition issues. Mary Ann is certified as a Master Career Counselor (MCC) by the National Career Development Association, a Life/Work Counselor by the National Employment Counseling Association, and is a Distance Credentialed Counselor (DCC). Please visit her web site at http://www.yourcareerplan.com/ for more information on her services.

To contact Mary Ann, please call (513) 665-4444 x3 and leave a personal and confidential voice message or send an email to YourCareerPlan@cinci.rr.com.